“Rejection Letter” By Carl D’Agostino

February 19, 2013

Carl D'Agostino

Categories: fiction, Humor/Poems by Carl D'Agostino Tags: rejection letter

84 responses to ““Rejection Letter” By Carl D’Agostino”

Wendell A. Brown
March 10th, 2013 at 17:35

Carl, you will find one that appreciates your creativity! Just keep this is mind, what did the art critics and lovers of art think upon viewing Picasso’s first work of art…they probably screamed at the top of their lungs heresy!!!! And you know what history speaks for itself and makes fools of many who cannot step outside of their restrictive minds. Keep going forward my brother! God bless and much love to you and your family!

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- Carl D'Agostino
  March 11th, 2013 at 07:33
  
  Itsa tough world out there.
  
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alesiablogs
February 25th, 2013 at 13:15

I think the fact you have given of yourself freely on your blog is amazing. I know your cartoons will bring a smile to my face.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  March 11th, 2013 at 07:32
  
  I hope so too.
  
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alesiablogs
February 25th, 2013 at 10:10

crazy funny!

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 25th, 2013 at 12:55
  
  Well it ain’t funny if you have a coupla hundred of these letters over four decades !
  
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  - alesiablogs
    February 25th, 2013 at 12:59
    
    Are you kidding me? I am so new to writing that I do not even think I could ever think of being published. Yet, I know I can get my work out there through folks I know who understand how to publish on amazon etc. I like writing, but have no idea about anything else in the publishing field, but the good thing I have spent many months now studying how it works and I am convinced the best way is to self publish with the help of others who know the game.
    
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  - Carl D'Agostino
    February 25th, 2013 at 13:09
    
    SECRET TO GETTING PUBLISHED: Focus on poetry a while and enter all the contests. They pick several hundred “winners” to be published in an anthology. You pay $65 for your copy of published book and can order more. It is really a money maker for the sponsors but I have been published in a dozen poetry books. Published is published and now one can build portfolio of success for more serious consideration. Publishing my cartoon books has been a nightmare – everyone is geared for print and there are several reformatting protocols to upload. I will take my cartoons to a printer who will make 100 cartoon paperback, glossy cover, sound binding for $3.50 each and I will sell my self on blog and open accounts with sellers on net.
    
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bitgit
February 23rd, 2013 at 07:02

Very stylish and creative … suspect it’s spoof, but would wish all such had wit.

Lucky it didn’t suggest an alternative career as Kleenex supplier.

Would love to see the manuscript “submitted” – a prequel if you will.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 23rd, 2013 at 07:53
  
  Just short funny stuff and cartoons and a little art for me.
  
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WordsFallFromMyEyes
February 23rd, 2013 at 05:35

Is this a joke, Carl – as in, you typed this rejection letter?

I mean, at first it read OK, but the ‘your mother must be proud’ and so on, let alone the last paragraph: that’s all just an insult. This ISN’T real, is it???

If it is, tell them they are imperfect because of their typo ‘we’ instead of ‘were’ in their point no. 4.

SHEESH, I don’t know if this is fair dinkum…

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 23rd, 2013 at 05:45
  
  Yes, a joke of course.
  
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  - WordsFallFromMyEyes
    February 23rd, 2013 at 05:46
    
    Oh my God, I’m so gullible. But thanks for getting back to me…
    
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clinock
February 23rd, 2013 at 03:44

Totally hilarious and unbelievable – perhaps submit this to someone somewhere – maybe a stand up comedienne’s writer…

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 23rd, 2013 at 05:46
  
  Seinfeld
  
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  - clinock
    February 23rd, 2013 at 06:41
    
    Who?
    
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  - Carl D'Agostino
    February 23rd, 2013 at 07:47
    
    see utube
    
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Lori Lipsky
February 21st, 2013 at 08:39

Sorry you have to have such a frown to make me smile. 🙂
Pick the pencil factory, Carl. You can write in the evenings; the paper mill doesn’t smell the best.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 21st, 2013 at 12:11
  
  Yes I think that’s the way to go-but the eraser factory has high demand sales and sure to be a more stable job.
  
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Valentine Logar
February 21st, 2013 at 08:04

They were simply jealous and all their other authors threatened to take their books elsewhere if they published you.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 21st, 2013 at 08:09
  
  It’s a dog eat dog world in this publishing rat race out there. A real cat fight. I will continue to try to worm my way in. Whatever.
  
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monicastangledweb
February 21st, 2013 at 02:11

Such an insightful and helpful letter. Now you know what to do next time. Also, fyi, I find that adding a postage stamp to the envelope helps the letter get their more quickly.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 21st, 2013 at 07:11
  
  How do you know about such things ? I will definitely try this.
  
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Deborah
February 20th, 2013 at 21:09

tsk, tsk, are you pulling my leg 🙂

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 21:23
  
  tee hee
  
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joanna
February 20th, 2013 at 10:11

oh! the agony of rejection… or hilarity, as it were. we all need to take it with a bit more of your salt, Carl.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 15:41
  
  My first cartoons were published after 35 years of trying. They had enough for six more issues but the mag went bust – just my luck.
  
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hollydjackson
February 19th, 2013 at 22:07

Oh my this is good. Thanks for making me smile!

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 07:25
  
  Smile makin’ is our mission. Welcome to blog.
  
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RoSy
February 19th, 2013 at 21:22

I’d still be proud & frame the letter 😉

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 07:24
  
  With gold leaf, for sure !
  
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cat
February 19th, 2013 at 20:49

I’ll hire you, C … we’ll start pulling calves soon … how about spring time on the farm 🙂

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 07:23
  
  Me on a farm ? This Yankee city boy gets laughed at just entering the produce section at the grocery store.
  
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likeamagnet
February 19th, 2013 at 20:06

So good.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 07:22
  
  New Yorkers NEVER give compliments so thanks.
  
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Genie
February 19th, 2013 at 19:41

Geez, that’s just so hilarious!!! lol…………

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 07:21
  
  Glad it tickled.
  
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ManicDdaily
February 19th, 2013 at 17:13

Tough luck! k.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 20th, 2013 at 07:20
  
  I’ll try again.
  
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poemsandponderings
February 19th, 2013 at 14:18

I think that you should critique their work as well. For instance you do not peruse alternative careers in literature… You should pursue them! lol

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 14:43
  
  You are absolutely right and was wondering who would catch it. It is my fault – a typo but I re-edited (redundancy?)so many times for this piece I just let this one go by. In # 4 it should read “were” instead of “we”. My skills are limited as my things are scanned as jpegs to post and you can’t edit jpeg and got tired of fixing in abiword and libra office and re-scanning. I consider myself a top notch proof reader but we often cannot recognize our errors as the mind sees what it expects to be there and not always what actually is (had same problem with choice of women). I have never been so prideful that I would not let someone else proof read my own stuff and as matter of fact such is good practice. As they say is baseball: “good eye”.
  
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Bridgesburning Chris King
February 19th, 2013 at 12:44

How can a company that old fail to recognize a best seller? I tagged you for something a little different if you are up to it!

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 13:06
  
  Send it and I’ll see. It is somewhat embarrassing to note how limited my computer skills are but got just enough to get the blog up there. I have stopped passing on those awards things because the veteran bloggers already have them and don’t seem to want to be bothered. I did a reread and sounds like fun so send. Please do not be offended if I do not jump in immediately as I have to rebuild my file for my Wednesday guest posts as much had been deleted and that will be a chore dependent on the cooperation of others. Delighted to take a moment here to respond because I really do value and appreciate your effort to include me in the game. I like a “game” and the one on my blog is how commenters play off and make puns on my post/theme which makes it interactive and the comments are often funnier than my original post.
  
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Carl D'Agostino
February 19th, 2013 at 12:34

I do not know how to play the tag game but thanks.

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Mark Petruska
February 19th, 2013 at 12:07

I smell a sequel in the works…

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:35
  
  You can bet on that.
  
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  - Carl
    February 19th, 2013 at 14:39
    
    I am gambling on the idea that they’ll nail you on effect/affect, so don’t put two/too/to much down on the table!
    
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  - Carl D'Agostino
    February 19th, 2013 at 15:12
    
    Not to worry. Got win/win/win down pat.
    
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Deb
February 19th, 2013 at 11:45

Re-submit.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:35
  
  That is right. They are merely testing my resolve.
  
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Maxi
February 19th, 2013 at 11:20

The last few sentences can’t be real … got my hackles up big time. It’s one thing to reject someone’s work, it’s another to outright insult a person.

It doesn’t matter who publishes the work, it is the author who has to sell it. This is why I self-publish.

Send me a copy if you decide to self-publish, Dag. I will put a review on my blog.

All the best to you, my friend. You have a lot of us rootin’ for ya.
Blessings ~ Maxi

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:33
  
  It’s all a joke my friend. See above tag “fiction”. But I’ll take you up on that review when it really does happen.
  
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vb holmes
February 19th, 2013 at 10:54

Poetry and now rejection letters–you’re spreading your wings, and talents.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:29
  
  You can create a lot of cool stuff with these word things.
  
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Craig N.
February 19th, 2013 at 09:37

Victor Hugo & Ernest Hemingway Watch Out!

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:29
  
  I am very good at filling out applications too.
  
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Hansi
February 19th, 2013 at 09:37

Rectangular pages…what a concept.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:28
  
  I was hoping such would not fit into the circular file.
  
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  - pattisj
    February 19th, 2013 at 23:45
    
    You outdid yourself on this one, Carl. Rectangular pages! You may be wearing a frown in the picture, but your eyes are smiling.
    
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seeker
February 19th, 2013 at 09:25

Their loss, our gain. I’ll hire you as my English Teacher and I’ll give you 101%

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 12:27
  
  I do have an English minor and better than most insight on grammar.
  
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thunderbolt1959
February 19th, 2013 at 09:05

Hey you only fail when you give up, so keep on trying!!! 🙂

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 09:13
  
  It it helpful to take a step back to re-access one’s writing efforts. Realizing that, this week I intend to practice writing the entire alphabet several times.
  
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Lorinda J. Taylor
February 19th, 2013 at 08:47

Wowser! A poisonal rejection! Youse did good, man!

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:53
  
  Geez, I never lookedid at it likes dat. I gotta a poisonal reject not a form letter. This is so encouraging and I will get my pen and paper out of da trash immediately. Delighted to communicate with someone that speaks proper English with our Stadnyland/Brooklynese accent.
  
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  - Carl D'Agostino
    February 19th, 2013 at 08:56
    
    I trydid to looks youse up but I am not on dem facebook tings.
    
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Red
February 19th, 2013 at 08:11

I did not realize you could adhere to such rigorous standards. The pages were in chronological order? Wow. Such discipline.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:27
  
  Of course. I went to commege for 5 years.
  
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- WordsFallFromMyEyes
  February 23rd, 2013 at 05:40
  
  Red… RED!! So glad to catch you here.
  
  I can’t get on your site because it crashes each time for me. I was giving it a rest, to try again later, but the message was ‘mommasmoneymatters is not responding because of (a lot of? or heavy? – can’t remember) scripting’. And there was a choice to click ‘stop the scripting?’ and when I did, I couldn’t toggle up the page or down (ie read then comment).
  
  I don’t know if it’s Daniel’s desktop fault… but can’t be as I’m doing the rounds tonight (Saturday) and having problems nowhere else. Has anyone else reported problems to you, Red??
  
  Maybe I’m getting all alarmed over nothing, was just traffic or something, but am going to try finally one more time in about an hour.
  
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totsymae1011
February 19th, 2013 at 07:32

This is a real letter? Hmm…They put a lot of thought into this.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:28
  
  So I “reject” these publishers and will self publish and market.
  
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Carl
February 19th, 2013 at 07:30

I went the pencil factory route, and they told me I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed, so I might be better at Home Depot.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:30
  
  Become a master of weekend home projects.
  
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Judy Berman
February 19th, 2013 at 07:18

I’d say it’s a “go” and you should resubmit. Laughing, Carl. Very creative. My fear is this is EXACTLY the type of rejection letter I’d get.

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:32
  
  Just remember: Who is subjective / nominative case and whom is objective case in relation to the verb or the object of a preposition and you’ll at least get that right ALL the time.
  
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stripman
February 19th, 2013 at 06:41

Very positive !

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:33
  
  At least they did not completely humiliate me.
  
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utesmile
February 19th, 2013 at 06:17

86% on who and whom……..impressive….. 🙂

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- Carl D'Agostino
  February 19th, 2013 at 08:34
  
  Did 98% on to, too and two !
  
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  - utesmile
    February 19th, 2013 at 10:31
    
    wow…. 🙂
    
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- SoundEagle
  February 20th, 2013 at 11:48
  
  Carl,
  
  SoundEagle has a sneaky suspicion about the authenticity, or rather, the audacity of the letter . . . . .
  
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  - utesmile
    February 20th, 2013 at 13:05
    
    me too but I didn’t want to say it…..
    
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  - SoundEagle
    February 20th, 2013 at 19:05
    
    Hence both of us could smile, wink, declare and conclude that Carl has simultaneously mastered “the art of forgery” and “the art of unflattery”. 😉
    
    Carl, better luck next time with your publisher(s)!
    
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  - Carl D'Agostino
    February 20th, 2013 at 15:38
    
    Well not everyone caught on but you did.
    
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2 Trackbacks / Pingbacks

Rejection Slip-Up | Dataholics: the IT addiction March 15th, 2013 at 08:26

[…] (or The Glass Bead Game Revisited) – then there’s a very good chance you’ll enjoy “Rejection Letter” By Carl D’Agostino. In fact, there’s lots of good stuff on his blog you might enjoy. For a start, his cartoons […]

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11-11-11 The Game is Afoot Part 2 and an invitation « bridgesburning February 19th, 2013 at 12:15

[…] Carl – if you want to make us smile with this one – come on down! (we would never rejuect you!) […]

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“Rejection Letter” By Carl D’Agostino

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“Rejection Letter” By Carl D’Agostino

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